Insomnia

 so I was trying a bit of neurogaphic drawing:

it reminded me of something I wrote while having another insomnia bout...

I have been suffering from insomnia since I was 8 I think... I remember I used to get frustrated so much , would ask mom to sleep next to me then ask her every 5mn if she was still awake...

and as I got older nothing worked... I tried everything , suggestions, things I read about... nothing works when the brain says no; when the brains wants to go to every tiny itsy bitsy detail of anything and go round and round... whoohoo

the only thing that bothers me about it now is that I will definitely be tired the following day, and that ain't fun...this is where meditation can come in handy, helping me relax a bit... 

oh and realised it's seasonal... mostly happens in October/November and may/June...

anyway,

here goes...

Make It Manifest:

Garbage truck beeping for what seems like hours now

What else will I blame my insomnia on

There are wolves in the field, the sheep are hiding

It’s a funny thing when

Crying in not gonna go down

Any well, any hole, any scream score.

You gotta want it, and you gotta ask for it

Make it manifest

Like the lights in my eyes that aren’t even blinking

What else will I blame my insomnia on

There are needs and desires and so many feels

It’s a tragedy when

There isn’t an object of

Affection, love, abundant connection

You gotta find it, no you gotta let go and let it happen

Make it manifest

Like the fire within, undulating with my vitality

What else will I blame my insomnia on

There are ways I could use this, seems so damn easy

It’s a total waste when

Sustenance is depleting

Any energy, any inspiration, any ray of hope left

You gotta try harder, no you gotta aim better

Make it manifest

Make it manifest